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Suicide is a serious problem. According to recently released figures 6,069 people ended their life in 2023. About 20% of the population have entertained thoughts of suicide at some time in their life, so how can we be prepared to help?
John Bunyan explores this in his spiritual classic, Pilgrim’s Progress. Christian is imprisoned with his friend Hopeful in the castle of Giant Despair. The giant beats them senseless and throws them into a dark, stinking cell.
Bunyan spent twelve years in Bedford gaol for his refusal to conform to ‘official’ Christian forms of worship. He lived on the edge of poverty much of his life and his daughter was completely blind. This is writing from experience:
When morning was come, Giant Despair goes to them… he told them, that since they were never like to come out of that place, their only way would be forthwith to make an end of themselves, either with knife, noose or poison, for why should you choose life, seeing it is attended with such bitterness?
This takes Christian to the edge:
Brother, said Christian, what shall we do? For my part I know not whether is best, to live thus, or to die out of hand. My soul chooseth strangling rather than life, the grave is more easy for me than this dungeon.
At first, Hopeful tells that suicide is self-murder and that God won’t like it. This was typical thinking for Bunyan’s time – until 1961 suicide was a criminal offense in England. Those who took their own lives were not buried on consecrated ground – occasionally, they were left to rot on the town dump. Times have changed, but the guilt card is still tempting; Don’t do guilt, it doesn’t work.
But Hopeful learns quickly, listening carefully to Christian’s woes, and gently challenging his pessimism:
My brother, rememberest thou not how valiant thou hast been heretofore? Apollyon could not crush thee, nor could all that thou didst hear, see or feel in the Valley of the Shadow of Death. What hardship, terror and amazement thou hast already gone through!
Then he assures Christian that he is not alone, encouraging him to be patient, reassuring him that his mood will lift.
Thou seest that I am in the dungeon with thee, a far weaker man by nature than thou art; also, this Giant has wounded me as well as thee, and hath also cut off the bread and water from my mouth; and with thee I mourn without the light. But let us exercise a little more patience.
Hopeful stays with Christian, gently encouraging him away from despair, towards hope. Here is the breakthrough:
A little before it was day, good Christian, as one half amazed, brake out in this passionate speech; What a fool am I, thus to lie in a stinking dungeon when I may walk at liberty! I have a key in my bosom called Promise, that will, I am persuaded, open any lock in Doubting Castle.
Bunyan knew from experience that that the promises of God can pull you out of the darkness. Yet even those who don’t believe can find reasons for living if, like Hopeful, we can keep our friend alive until they find their keys and use them.
Hopeful was a good listener who didn’t give up on his friend. He could gently challenge Christian’s pessimism and help him see reasons to stay alive. And he was prayerful.
We can all do this, and it would help if we did some suicide prevention training in our church. Be prepared, you never know when the crisis will happen.